and yet I really have nothing of worth to say right now. I have struggled with a heavy weight of anxiety and fear over things that have happened in the last year. It seems that things are just piling up on me. The bills just keep coming in and it looks like they are going to continue with no end in sight. I found another bill in the pile of mail I finally had time to open today. $905.00 due apon receipt, yeaaaaa I will get the check in the mail tomorrow! This is from Michaels accident last summer, I am still paying bills on that one and now I have yet another one as the insurance would only cover $4500 of the medical for Michaels injuries. At least they covered the 4500! gotta try to see the positive in this. I have been trying to get us out of debt and it seems like everytime I make any headway I get knocked back 2 steps for every 1 I take. Getting frustrating to say the least. It is easy to say that God is our source and that He will provide, and I do believe that with all my heart. I have watched Him provide in the most amazing and surprising ways, yet it is still hard when you are walking through the valley and wondering what is coming down the road next. I hate getting the mail, I hate answering my phone, both have been bad news more than not. it is much easier to encourage someone else going through this than to walk it yourself. The hardest part is being completely out of control. I have no control over what is coming toward us. No control over the events that have transpired and are going to transpire. I don’t like that. I want to be able to have some form of control in my life and right now there really isn’t any. Life goes on and this to shall pass.